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> What He Said! (db On Commandment #7), Doug B. on Adultery
maggiecttr
post May 7 2007, 03:25 PM
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Being pretty new here, I'm not sure if I should've made this a New Topic or just put it in under another thread, but here goes (Moderators: Please move this to another thread if warranted.)

I taped most of the Ten Commandments Weekend (live presentation) on Sabbath, and just today got a chance to watch most of it. I was half-listening to Doug Batchelor's presentation on the 7th Commandment regarding adultery when the screen went black, then came back on again showing some flowers and music, then returned to the live feed. So I missed whatever he had said as a lead-in to the following interesting comments/observations he was making. But as I listened, I pricked up my ears...the scenario being presented seemed somehow...familiar. Herewith is the transcribed portion (I rewound the tape a dozen times to catch it the best I could):

(Doug, looking kind-of "worked up"):
"I'm going to be straight with you---do you want me to be straight with you? They're married; they know what the Bible says about the obligations; they made a promise in the sight of God. But they don't want to be with the person they are married to, so what they do is, they try to make that person as miserable as possible, and they drive them away. And, sometimes, the way they do that is by using intimacy as a reward and punishment device. They almost want to see of they can drive the person to an affair so they're then justified in divorcing and they can be the one that's innocent and the other one's guilty. IS THIS STRAIGHT ENOUGH FOR YOU?! (emphasis Doug's) I mean -- you know-- I've seen all the games that people play...Paul recognized that-- that's why he said, 'Do not defraud one another; you are one flesh" and --well--I won't get into that yet...I better pace myself.."

So...since this coincidentally(?) sounds a lot like what I've read (via 3abn itself and on the boards concerning the Danny-Linda divorce) maybe DB hasn't burried his head in the sand, and we may be hearing more from him one of these days. A girl can hope! smile.gif

Comments?
Maggie

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LaurenceD
post May 7 2007, 03:58 PM
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Very perceptive, maggiecttr

I know men like that. A couple months ago, I put it like this:
    A good man doesn't force a woman back in her shell, deny her what she needs most (friends), then punish her for telling a white lie. She knows the hell she'll have to face once again if she's open and honest about everything that causes her sick, sick, jealous, dyspetic husband to explode.

    http://www.blacksda.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=12180
Not only do I know men like that, but I know how their women react to being treated. They'll get yelled at, and in big trouble, because the man is so quick to judge, the women can't do anything right, and so when he yells, "where you been?" she knows she has to answer very carefully, even though she lost her keys (which means more anger) and was at the grocery store for more than 15 minutes. So she says something like, "I decided to stop by and get you something special" which is a white lie.

His anger is then deflated and they live together in peace for one more day. Like survival.

EDIT NOTE: corrected the link so it works...called "Letter to Calvin"

This post has been edited by LaurenceD: May 7 2007, 04:27 PM


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princessdi
post May 7 2007, 04:02 PM
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Welcome Maggie! I really want you to do get outta my head! Why ws I thinking the same thing, while watching this at my parents house of Sabbath?


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Di


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Seraphim7
post May 7 2007, 04:48 PM
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QUOTE(LaurenceD @ May 7 2007, 06:58 PM) [snapback]194538[/snapback]

Very perceptive, maggiecttr

"I decided to stop by and get you something special" which is a white lie.


I can appreciate your points and agree, for the most part. Please bear in mind the "white" lie you refer to is a lie. There is no such thing.


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Skyhook
post May 7 2007, 05:03 PM
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My only question about Doug's remarks is he implying that Linda was witholding intimacy, and trying to drive the other person away, or was Danny? His remarks could be interpreted either way according to one's presuppositions. I hope he meant what we think he meant. If so, that is a very good development, and Doug has a good sense of irony and justice. Isn't there a saying that says something about "bearding the lion in his den?"
But if Danny understood it the way we hope Doug meant it, that would seem to me to put the merger in jeapordy if it has not been actually consumated already.

This post has been edited by Skyhook: May 7 2007, 05:04 PM
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princessdi
post May 7 2007, 05:12 PM
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I think we all spend too much time together here in the day! Whew!!! I am going to have to start charging rent for the space folks is taking in my head! LOL!!!

QUOTE(Skyhook @ May 7 2007, 03:03 PM) [snapback]194542[/snapback]

My only question about Doug's remarks is he implying that Linda was witholding intimacy, and trying to drive the other person away, or was Danny? His remarks could be interpreted either way according to one's presuppositions. I hope he meant what we think he meant. If so, that is a very good development, and Doug has a good sense of irony and justice. Isn't there a saying that says something about "bearding the lion in his den?"
But if Danny understood it the way we hope Doug meant it, that would seem to me to put the merger in jeapordy if it has not been actually consumated already.



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Di


And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose---Romans 8:28

A great many people believe they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.-- William James

It is better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.- Mark Twain
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lurker
post May 7 2007, 05:20 PM
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QUOTE(Skyhook @ May 7 2007, 05:03 PM) [snapback]194542[/snapback]

My only question about Doug's remarks is he implying that Linda was witholding intimacy, and trying to drive the other person away, or was Danny? His remarks could be interpreted either way according to one's presuppositions. I hope he meant what we think he meant. If so, that is a very good development, and Doug has a good sense of irony and justice. Isn't there a saying that says something about "bearding the lion in his den?"
But if Danny understood it the way we hope Doug meant it, that would seem to me to put the merger in jeapordy if it has not been actually consumated already.


If the man gets itchy um.. feet, that is often his excuse for running around because no one can prove him wrong. The wife is accused of being "cold", frigid, not meeting his needs. How many times "the other women" is told this. How many women feel sorry for him until they become the new wife who knows she is not sexless but finds that since she is no longer a challenge, he is out looking for new conquests.

I know it can happen but I would be very cautious about accepting the word of one who has a lot of people saying that he has a history of being, shall we say, dissatisfied.
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Jnana15
post May 7 2007, 05:54 PM
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QUOTE(princessdi @ May 7 2007, 05:02 PM) [snapback]194539[/snapback]

Welcome Maggie! I really want you to do get outta my head! Why ws I thinking the same thing, while watching this at my parents house of Sabbath?



Great mind think alike.
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Seraphim7
post May 7 2007, 06:02 PM
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QUOTE(Skyhook @ May 7 2007, 08:03 PM) [snapback]194542[/snapback]

My only question about Doug's remarks is he implying that Linda was witholding intimacy, and trying to drive the other person away, or was Danny? His remarks could be interpreted either way according to one's presuppositions. I hope he meant what we think he meant. If so, that is a very good development, and Doug has a good sense of irony and justice. Isn't there a saying that says something about "bearding the lion in his den?"
But if Danny understood it the way we hope Doug meant it, that would seem to me to put the merger in jeapordy if it has not been actually consumated already.

blink.gif "consummated", not sure I care for the sound of that...

My impression, based on the comments noted by Eld. DB, is that he seems to be acknowledging that LS was being pushed away, so that DS could make the accusations he did against her and thus, call himself justifying the actions he took. BTJM dunno.gif


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Skyhook
post May 7 2007, 07:33 PM
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QUOTE(seraph|m @ May 7 2007, 07:02 PM) [snapback]194548[/snapback]

blink.gif "consummated", not sure I care for the sound of that...

My impression, based on the comments noted by Eld. DB, is that he seems to be acknowledging that LS was being pushed away, so that DS could make the accusations he did against her and thus, call himself justifying the actions he took. BTJM dunno.gif

If that is true, and I hope your are right, then it seems to me that the only way the merger would happen (if it hasn't already been legally accomplished) is if Danny has already lost his power to control events and people at 3abn. Why would Doug say that right in front of Danny and the cameras if they are the "good buddies" that they tried to portray on April 19th?
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Rosyroi
post May 7 2007, 09:07 PM
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QUOTE
(Doug, looking kind-of "worked up"):
"I'm going to be straight with you---do you want me to be straight with you? They're married; they know what the Bible says about the obligations; they made a promise in the sight of God. But they don't want to be with the person they are married to, so what they do is, they try to make that person as miserable as possible, and they drive them away. And, sometimes, the way they do that is by using intimacy as a reward and punishment device. They almost want to see of they can drive the person to an affair so they're then justified in divorcing and they can be the one that's innocent and the other one's guilty. IS THIS STRAIGHT ENOUGH FOR YOU?! (emphasis Doug's) I mean -- you know-- I've seen all the games that people play...Paul recognized that-- that's why he said, 'Do not defraud one another; you are one flesh" and --well--I won't get into that yet...I better pace myself.."


I am speechless. Thank you Maggie.

Rosyroi

This post has been edited by Rosyroi: May 7 2007, 09:08 PM


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"Don't waste your time waiting and longing for large opportunities which may never come, but faitfully handle the little things that are always claiming your attention..." F.B. Meyers

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If they're not killed through abortion, he wants them neglected or abused physically, emotionally, sexually...One way or another, the legions of hell want to destroy children because children become the future adults and leaders. If they (legions) can warp or wound a child, he or she becomes a warped or wounded adult who passes on this affliction to the next generation". -Terry Randall in TIME Magazine, October 21, 1991
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princessdi
post May 7 2007, 09:24 PM
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Has anybody noticed that nobosy asks Danny what he thinks about anything. He an only go on at 3ABN, When NAD wanted somebody to talk about it they asked DB, and so did everybody else. According to NAD the boards are exploring the possiblity.

QUOTE(Skyhook @ May 7 2007, 05:33 PM) [snapback]194554[/snapback]

If that is true, and I hope your are right, then it seems to me that the only way the merger would happen (if it hasn't already been legally accomplished) is if Danny has already lost his power to control events and people at 3abn. Why would Doug say that right in front of Danny and the cameras if they are the "good buddies" that they tried to portray on April 19th?



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Di


And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose---Romans 8:28

A great many people believe they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.-- William James

It is better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.- Mark Twain
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mozart
post May 7 2007, 10:18 PM
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well, now, let's back the truck up a bit. or maybe the tape up a bit.
maggie, would you do me a favor and look at that tape one more time and tell me if you heard DB talking about "how long is too long to talk to someone of the opposite sex on the telephone"? i'm quite sure he mentioned this and said anything over 15min. is too long. now, correct me if i'm wrong, which i trust you guys to do, but isn't that one of danny's lines? i heard db talking about the issue of the trouble one can get into if they spend too much time alone talking to someone of the opposite sex. unless it was another sermon he did on the same topic on the same day, i'm sure i heard him say these things. he said it would always lead to intimacy, so for married people it was very dangerous. i think he even said something about counceling women in the church. that if a woman in the church comes to the preacher, i.e., that there should be another person present or they should call in a woman in the church to speak to her. something like that.
i had the opposite take on this.

QUOTE(Rosyroi @ May 7 2007, 08:07 PM) [snapback]194565[/snapback]

I am speechless. Thank you Maggie.

Rosyroi



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Instead we seem to be using sensationalism, emotionalism, moving lights and motivational speakers that are prepared to manipulate, by well chosen words, the minds of the listeners.
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princessdi
post May 7 2007, 11:10 PM
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Well, now, I remember him saying somethinglike he asked his son how many women friends did he remember him(db) having, and the answer w as none. He also said that his office has a Window in it. for counseling sessions with women. I don't rmember the phone call time limit, but I was a bit distracted with my little nephews. it is also possible that it could have been DB's line all the time and DS counveniently used it to his advantage.

QUOTE(mozart @ May 7 2007, 09:18 PM) [snapback]194573[/snapback]

well, now, let's back the truck up a bit. or maybe the tape up a bit.
maggie, would you do me a favor and look at that tape one more time and tell me if you heard DB talking about "how long is too long to talk to someone of the opposite sex on the telephone"? i'm quite sure he mentioned this and said anything over 15min. is too long. now, correct me if i'm wrong, which i trust you guys to do, but isn't that one of danny's lines? i heard db talking about the issue of the trouble one can get into if they spend too much time alone talking to someone of the opposite sex. unless it was another sermon he did on the same topic on the same day, i'm sure i heard him say these things. he said it would always lead to intimacy, so for married people it was very dangerous. i think he even said something about counceling women in the church. that if a woman in the church comes to the preacher, i.e., that there should be another person present or they should call in a woman in the church to speak to her. something like that.
i had the opposite take on this.



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Di


And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose---Romans 8:28

A great many people believe they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.-- William James

It is better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.- Mark Twain
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Aletheia
post May 8 2007, 03:03 AM
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QUOTE(Skyhook @ May 7 2007, 07:03 PM) [snapback]194542[/snapback]

My only question about Doug's remarks is he implying that Linda was witholding intimacy, and trying to drive the other person away, or was Danny? His remarks could be interpreted either way according to one's presuppositions. I hope he meant what we think he meant. If so, that is a very good development, and Doug has a good sense of irony and justice. Isn't there a saying that says something about "bearding the lion in his den?"
But if Danny understood it the way we hope Doug meant it, that would seem to me to put the merger in jeapordy if it has not been actually consumated already.


What? only two choices? either he was talking about Danny or he was talking about Linda? What if he was just straight out proclaiming biblical and godly principles, and teaching about the seventh commandment, and it was to and for all?


Sadly, the one "implying" , and claiming it was about Danny and Linda, and even surmising, that he was bearding the lion in his den, and that this may mean the merger is in jepardy, is you...

And worse, others are adding to it already...

And really, the only question here is why write this? What is your motive and intent?




QUOTE(mozart @ May 8 2007, 12:18 AM) [snapback]194573[/snapback]

well, now, let's back the truck up a bit. or maybe the tape up a bit.
maggie, would you do me a favor and look at that tape one more time and tell me if you heard DB talking about "how long is too long to talk to someone of the opposite sex on the telephone"? i'm quite sure he mentioned this and said anything over 15min. is too long. now, correct me if i'm wrong, which i trust you guys to do, but isn't that one of danny's lines? i heard db talking about the issue of the trouble one can get into if they spend too much time alone talking to someone of the opposite sex. unless it was another sermon he did on the same topic on the same day, i'm sure i heard him say these things. he said it would always lead to intimacy, so for married people it was very dangerous.


I heard nothing resembling this in his words this past weekend.






QUOTE


i think he even said something about counceling women in the church. that if a woman in the church comes to the preacher, i.e., that there should be another person present or they should call in a woman in the church to speak to her. something like that.
i had the opposite take on this.


Yes that's correct, I heard that too, I believe he mentioned having women councelors on staff, he also brought up even avoiding the appearance of evil or impropriety.

This post has been edited by Aletheia: May 8 2007, 03:09 AM


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Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour: I am the LORD. Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him. Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD. Lev 19:12-18

Pro 26:20 Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out: so where there is no talebearer, the strife ceaseth.
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